Thread: Scary if these get hold of you.

My other baboon story... If you find this hard to believe, ask my wife!

1998. Me and the wife were in Chobe, Botswana, for a spot of camping whilst surrounded by things that will eat you. We elected to use the proper out there bush camps, well away from the more touristy managed camps behind the fences, like the ones in Kruger. Another group arrived and whilst setting up their tents, a troop of baboons raided their utes, with one large male ripping the lid of an Engel fridge, wrecking it completely. Cue a very angry man swearing a lot and pointlessly throwing sticks at retreating baboons. The group pushed off the next day to the managed campsite inside the wire.

We were very careful to not leave anything out while we were away from camp, but on return that evening we discovered a baboon had unzipped our tent, gone inside and consumed quite a lot of anti-malaria prophylaxis before taking a dump on my pillow.

The next morning we were up early and making coffee in the billy over the fire. As usual there were some baboons sitting in the grass, just out of reach of a well thrown stick. Watching, waiting. A couple of them ventured quite close, along the top of the bank down to the lagoon. A sudden crack, then a bang, and the baboon sitting low in the tree some 20m behind the wife was thrown back and fell with a thump to the ground. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK????!!!!

Way over the other side of the large camp clearing, a good 150m away, an African game warden stood up from cover, all white toothy grin, waving. He was carrying a rifle, open sights. He didn't even come over, he just waved again, grinned a lot and disappeared into the bush. We couldn't believe it, the trajectory of his shot couldn't have been more than 5m from where we were sitting, straight past us. The baboon was very dead, I'll give him that.

We followed up with the wardens at the posh camp. Yes, the man whose fridge had been wrecked had complained, so the warden was sent to teach the baboons a lesson. Quite normal, nothing to worry about sir. It's very hard for the wardens to get close to baboons, sir, as soon as they see an African in green fatigues carrying a rifle, they're off. He's a very good shot sir, wouldn't you agree? All discussed with a big smile...

Different times, different rules. We never were properly babooned, with the exception of the shit in my bed. Got away with it. They're a lot more worrisome than the Keas in Arthur's Pass, that's for sure.