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Go to your local park in the evening sit on a bench seat and feed the ducks. Take bread, a short piece of mono with duck sized hook, a Penthouse mag or similar and wear a long perverty coat with hood.
Just before dark with a circle of ducks around you and no one in sight, toss the bread baited hook in front of a fat greenhead, pull him in, wring neck, put in pocket inside coat. If some nosey bugger comes along and the drake flaps under your coat just pretend that you are pulling yourself looking at the Penthouse. In all likely hood you will be avoided by a wide margin anyway.
My Grandfather did this after WW2 when it was hard to get meat. Had a coat with 12 special duck pockets sewn inside
That had me cracking up.Quite inventive but I am not game to try it...especially as our local gardens has in the past had at least one guy caught and convicted of catching and rapeing the ducks
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