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Thread: Toby's day. (By Rushy)

  1. #46
    Member
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    Feb 2013
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    spreydon christcurch.
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    munching on haggis is a treat to behold .taken with neeps(swede)&tattiesall washed down with a neat swallow of the scottish water of life!
    the wost part is carrying the bloody thing with a 3/4 pissed scotsman behind you swinging a bloody great knife within a hairsbreadth of your neck.
    Then whilst reciting a poem about it he stabs the shit out of it !
    A joy not to be missed.
    gadgetman likes this.

  2. #47
    OPCz Rushy's Avatar
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    Jun 2012
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    Nor West of Auckland on the true right of the Kaipara River
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    A wee bit od Robbie for you Kotuku.

    Address to a Haggis

    Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,
    Great chieftain o the puddin'-race!
    Aboon them a' ye tak your place,
    Painch, tripe, or thairm:
    Weel are ye worthy o' a grace
    As lang's my arm.

    The groaning trencher there ye fill,
    Your hurdies like a distant hill,
    Your pin wad help to mend a mill
    In time o need,
    While thro your pores the dews distil
    Like amber bead.

    His knife see rustic Labour dight,
    An cut you up wi ready slight,
    Trenching your gushing entrails bright,
    Like onie ditch;
    And then, O what a glorious sight,
    Warm-reekin, rich!

    Then, horn for horn, they stretch an strive:
    Deil tak the hindmost, on they drive,
    Till a' their weel-swall'd kytes belyve
    Are bent like drums;
    The auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
    'Bethankit' hums.

    Is there that owre his French ragout,
    Or olio that wad staw a sow,
    Or fricassee wad mak her spew
    Wi perfect scunner,
    Looks down wi sneering, scornfu view
    On sic a dinner?

    Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
    As feckless as a wither'd rash,
    His spindle shank a guid whip-lash,
    His nieve a nit;
    Thro bloody flood or field to dash,
    O how unfit!

    But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
    The trembling earth resounds his tread,
    Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
    He'll make it whissle;
    An legs an arms, an heads will sned,
    Like taps o thrissle.

    Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
    And dish them out their bill o fare,
    Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
    That jaups in luggies:
    But, if ye wish her gratefu prayer,
    Gie her a Haggis
    It takes 43 muscle's to frown and 17 to smile, but only 3 for proper trigger pull.
    What more do we need? If we are above ground and breathing the rest is up to us!
    Rule 1: Treat every firearm as loaded
    Rule 2: Always point firearms in a safe direction
    Rule 3: Load a firearm only when ready to fire
    Rule 4: Identify your target beyond all doubt
    Rule 5: Check your firing zone
    Rule 6: Store firearms and ammunition safely
    Rule 7: Avoid alcohol and drugs when handling firearms

  3. #48
    Caretaker stug's Avatar
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    May 2012
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    Rolleston, Canterbury
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    5,094
    Made a haggis once, a hell of a lot of work. Surprisingly nice even after I knew what had gone in to it. The whiskey did help though.

  4. #49
    Member
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    spreydon christcurch.
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    actually a wee spot of haggis would go down ideal at this moment!

  5. #50
    Member Hunt4life's Avatar
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    Apr 2013
    Location
    Katikati
    Posts
    626
    Thanks for the heart felt representation of us all Rushy. Arohanui you lot


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

 

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