Thread: Pukeko and "Sensitive bird caring frustrated gardener" problem.

If all else fails you'll just have to convince the wife that a couple need to be shot to keep the rest away, and will need to be repeated occasionally.
You could run with the classic "you need to brake a few eggs to make an omelette" argument

Electric fence?

Originally Posted by gsp follower

massive is totaly correct but try this
dig a massive hole conseal yourself in said hole.
wait for prey.
grab said pook by legs literally scareing the shit out of him/her.
step 2
after wiping pook shit from face and general area repeat until pooks desist or you run out of hidey holes
it goes without saying amount of pook excreta will vary with size of pook so dress accordingly and grip the smaller ones more gently.

Noooo you're doing it wrong. If the pook takes a crap on your face it's going to think it's dominant over you. You need to hold the pook still and take a crap on it so it knows who's boss.

Originally Posted by stug

Electric fence?

Too many friends with pacemakers or heart problems... or just plain scared of erictrickery... it did cross my mind...

Originally Posted by MassiveAttack

Noooo you're doing it wrong. If the pook takes a crap on your face it's going to think it's dominant over you. You need to hold the pook still and take a crap on it so it knows who's boss.

what while the rest of his pook family watches???
i bow to your superior knowledge of pook crap and species hierachy

Stuffed cat in the garden? Get a jack Russell and let it loose. I'd lend you my wirehair, he cleaned up all our chickens one afternoon. He was pretty proud of himself.

Originally Posted by stug

Stuffed cat in the garden? Get a jack Russell and let it loose. I'd lend you my wirehair, he cleaned up all our chickens one afternoon. He was pretty proud of himself.

i trust that emotion didnt last to long stug
were the chooks the misses??

Yep, he had got the lot and arranged them in his kennel run area. Wife was pretty understanding, he was used for game bird hunting and is her dog.

Originally Posted by stug

Yep, he had got the lot and arranged them in his kennel run area. Wife was pretty understanding, he was used for game bird hunting and is her dog.

if it had been you dog stug would she have been so cool about it
did you rearrange his backside with a dead chook?
you could have tried the old wives tales of tieing round his neck till it rotted.
but most aggravating smartarse dogs ive known would have just ripped it off and eaten it anyway

Too many friends with pacemakers or heart problems... or just plain scared of erictrickery... it did cross my mind...

T.A.S.E.R.

if closer i would lend you my dog (bull terrier cross dogo argentina). given a bit of training he would sort them out as he is amazing on rabbits. absolutely shreds them.
then again he also shredded my mountain bike, tyres off the rims, even managed to chew into an alloy frame !

Originally Posted by gonetropo

if closer i would lend you my dog (bull terrier cross dogo argentina). given a bit of training he would sort them out as he is amazing on rabbits. absolutely shreds them.
then again he also shredded my mountain bike, tyres off the rims, even managed to chew into an alloy frame !

get many burglars at your place "come enjoy our new batch of burgloburgers from our hot doggy supplier -freshly chewed human from between his buns!!
come and get em!!

Don't laugh too hard at that kotuku had an old mate in Joburg that was sick of getting burgled.
So got him selve two rottys. Got them trained up by the attack dog training centre that they have there.
Went away on holiday, cut a small hole in the neighbouring fence so that his good neighbors could feed them through this so that they did not have to enter the property. All good for the first few days......then the dogs would not eat
So neighbour calls the training centre (mate was out of cell phone coverage in Mozambique and had left instructions to not enter the property if there was a problem but call TC).
Guy from the centre comes around, enters through side gate. Dogs bound up and meet him. He told the owner latter that they looked very healthy and could not see why they had not eaten?
Goes round the back of house and finds the back door open. Looks into the kitchen see one very scared looking dude sitting up on top of the fridge second dude was under the table.....only half of him was leftoh so that's why dogs where not hungry
Had very glossy coats though.
Yarns said it made picking up there poo very interesting

Still dose not solve this problem though, don't think and electric fence would work sorry. We have one around our phesant pen to keep the foxes out and the birds don't get shocked.
What about a sprinkler hooked up to a motion sensor!

Originally Posted by Sideshow

Don't laugh too hard at that kotuku had an old mate in Joburg that was sick of getting burgled.
So got him selve two rottys. Got them trained up by the attack dog training centre that they have there.
Went away on holiday, cut a small hole in the neighbouring fence so that his good neighbors could feed them through this so that they did not have to enter the property. All good for the first few days......then the dogs would not eat
So neighbour calls the training centre (mate was out of cell phone coverage in Mozambique and had left instructions to not enter the property if there was a problem but call TC).
Guy from the centre comes around, enters through side gate. Dogs bound up and meet him. He told the owner latter that they looked very healthy and could not see why they had not eaten?
Goes round the back of house and finds the back door open. Looks into the kitchen see one very scared looking dude sitting up on top of the fridge second dude was under the table.....only half of him was leftoh so that's why dogs where not hungry
Had very glossy coats though.
Yarns said it made picking up there poo very interesting

....sooo the dogs had had a gutsfull of the dudes on the tables mate by then .....


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Nar he was for latter Ron