Thread: Poor pig islanders

Originally Posted by Wirehunt

A good friend wins awards in shit for her coffee roasting Doubt very much if the jafas know how to fill the entry forms.

Arrowtown of all places, very good HOT coffee $2.50, $3.50 average. Hell some places free. Pig island, bad luke warm coffee $5 and SLOW!

Bummer no bands play concerts in banjo land. We could come down and hang with the yokels.

Originally Posted by Wirehunt

A good friend wins awards in shit for her coffee roasting Doubt very much if the jafas know how to fill the entry forms.

Arrowtown of all places, very good HOT coffee $2.50, $3.50 average. Hell some places free. Pig island, bad luke warm coffee $5 and SLOW!

a] drink fuckin tea like a real man
b]being a transplant I don't get how many of you hillbillies kill each other on straight pieces of road.??
fuck what your problem with corners???
ive been behind some of you male/female and its like you have menstrual fits when you see anything more than a gentle curve.
c] jaffas area exception to every rule cos theyre fuckin JAFFAS.
its all that muggy wheather and being isolated in their own little enclaves.
howick ellerslie east poncevill .

Bummer no bands play concerts in banjo land. We could come down and hang with the yokels.

haha midnight oils coming to Christchurch aint they??
finally some shit that,l make sence.
''hello from the otherside''
otherside of fuckin what cook straight??
''all of me loves all of you''
john you no taller than a snake sitting on its tail and your misses is a big arse Asian chick that probablty beats your arse up every night.
I bet you scream you love her as she,s kung fu,in your short arse.
''how can we sleep when our beds are burning''
no ambiguity or false narrative there cos that's fuckin music.
the hardest part will be getting to and from the concert without getting killed by one of my corner hating straight road panicking villagers or getting stabbed and or robbed in chch.

Im with Wirehunt on this one,any city is a shithole and the bigger the city the bigger shithole it is.
I actually live in the city in the region I have lived all my life, I know the names of one st and the location of about 4 shops I may have to visit from time to time,I actively avoid going into the city at all ever if I can get away with it...good thing I got married
I had to go recently to renew my firearms licence and couldn't remember where the police station was and had to google it on my phone.

Originally Posted by Pointer

I think as a rabbiter you are uniquely equipped to 'make auckland great again'.

Firstly, containment. You could use packs of your dogs to patrol the border, not only keeping the infestation in one place, but instantly alleviating the rest of the countries traffic problem.

Secondly, eradication. Pindone in all of Aucklands coffee sacks, creating laced lattes across the city. After you have lowered the numbers this way, follow up with your ferrets, sending them into Aucklanders' burrows at night to eat their babies while you shoot the rest as they flee. (Is Sandra Kyle an Aucklander? )

Finally, monitoring. Foot patrolling the smoking ruins of auckland and keep an eye out for any signs of reinfestation. High house prices, bad driving, expensive coffee etc.

We're counting on you Wirehunt...

best thing I have read in ....................ages and in the same thread as the best rant I have heard in a long time.

from a chap who considers a trip over the "Strait" to be international travel

Originally Posted by gsp follower

the hardest part will be getting to and from the concert without getting killed by one of my corner hating straight road panicking villagers or getting stabbed and or robbed in chch.

I just just read this aloud and you've put the household into fits of laughter GSPF. Has to be quote of the night!

Originally Posted by veitnamcam

Im with Wirehunt on this one,any city is a shithole and the bigger the city the bigger shithole it is.
I actually live in the city in the region I have lived all my life, I know the names of one st and the location of about 4 shops I may have to visit from time to time,I actively avoid going into the city at all ever if I can get away with it...good thing I got married
I had to go recently to renew my firearms licence and couldn't remember where the police station was and had to google it on my phone.

Yeah she's pretty different up here in South Singapore

Wirecunt the angry guy

Originally Posted by Wirehunt

I feel sorry for you lot, HOWEVER that doesn't mean you can pack up and come down.

Had to go to jafaland Saturday night for a concert, at least that was great. Drove into town at 18:00 was outta there by 00:00....was meant to stay the night and see a few people Sunday, decided that a much wiser move was to get the hell out fast before I had to kill someone, possibly several people. Then there would be all that please explain, and court n shit.

You lot get fucked over buying coffee. Badly. Tastes like shit generally and is expensive, out of 10 coffees bought three were ok. You pig islanders can even fuck up a black coffee with no sugar.
Petrol. tisk tisk.
Driving. Do you lot, or is it compulsory thing to go to the fuckwit driving school? LOOKING LONG AND HARD AT JAFAS.
Service...I thought the south had gotten bad, how wrong was I...

Never fucking ever bitch about the amount of trucks on the roads in the north. EEEVVVEERR. 38 trucks between jafaville and Wellington, including a couple of buses. A shorter distance by well over 100km in the south, 155 trucks, same highway and didn't include trucks on road words down here.
And the flash roads you've got.....

But the kicker.......the fucking TERRIBLE tourist drivers we get down here, and they are bad, make a lot of jafa drivers look even worse. Or put it the other way jafas make the worst tourist drivers look good.

Us southerners are starting to pool resources to see if we can ban jafas from all inbound ferries and planes.
PS: Rabbit problem in Taihape....10 in a 10 metre radius is a problem
ALMOST stopped the ute coming back off the ferry to kiss the southern dirt....

So apart from one or two minor upsets, I'm glad to hear you had a good weekend......

B

And that is why they don't have concerts in the back waters of NZ. The musicians would have to play behind a mesh barrier

Originally Posted by Wirehunt

I feel sorry for you lot, HOWEVER that doesn't mean you can pack up and come down.

Had to go to jafaland Saturday night for a concert, at least that was great. Drove into town at 18:00 was outta there by 00:00....was meant to stay the night and see a few people Sunday, decided that a much wiser move was to get the hell out fast before I had to kill someone, possibly several people. Then there would be all that please explain, and court n shit.

You lot get fucked over buying coffee. Badly. Tastes like shit generally and is expensive, out of 10 coffees bought three were ok. You pig islanders can even fuck up a black coffee with no sugar.
Petrol. tisk tisk.
Driving. Do you lot, or is it compulsory thing to go to the fuckwit driving school? LOOKING LONG AND HARD AT JAFAS.
Service...I thought the south had gotten bad, how wrong was I...

Never fucking ever bitch about the amount of trucks on the roads in the north. EEEVVVEERR. 38 trucks between jafaville and Wellington, including a couple of buses. A shorter distance by well over 100km in the south, 155 trucks, same highway and didn't include trucks on road words down here.
And the flash roads you've got.....

But the kicker.......the fucking TERRIBLE tourist drivers we get down here, and they are bad, make a lot of jafa drivers look even worse. Or put it the other way jafas make the worst tourist drivers look good.

Us southerners are starting to pool resources to see if we can ban jafas from all inbound ferries and planes.
PS: Rabbit problem in Taihape....10 in a 10 metre radius is a problem
ALMOST stopped the ute coming back off the ferry to kiss the southern dirt....

Someone should have taken you down the Family Bar that would have given you something to complain about doubt you would have gotten out of there alive

Leave him alone guys. If a man wants to take his pack of foxy crosses to the Adele concert, he bloody well can!

What do I do with the whippets and pointers?

I hear there is some ginga playing in Dunners in a bit, wonder why not in the island of the pig?

Originally Posted by Wirehunt

What do I do with the whippets and pointers?

I hear there is some ginga playing in Dunners in a bit, wonder why not in the island of the pig?

Too white and ginger?

You could come back up and hunt pigs with them

the difference between auckland and a yogurt is that yogurt has an active living culture